To the tune of a Taylor Swift classic (if such a thing exists), Whitehawk fans used to sing “We are never, ever, ever, going back to Bognor.” After last night they’ll wish, more than ever (ever, ever), that their prediction had come true. After a first half with only one goal, scored by Tommy Scutt in the 24th minute, nobody could have foreseen what would happen in the second period; indeed, even after Scutt made it two six minutes after the restart the idea that there would be another six goals- all scored in fifteen minutes- would have been far-fetched.
And then Jimmy Muitt arrived from the bench on the hour mark.
Nineteen minutes later Muitt had four goals to his name. Remarkably, Doug Tuck and Harvey Whyte had also found the net just before and during the Muitt show, to leave the final score Bognor Regis Town 8 Whitehawk 0- a result that will undoubtedly be remembered for an awful long time by the people of Nyewood Lane.
But not only were Bognor not the top scorers of the night, they weren’t even the top scorers in Sussex! Down at College Lane, East Grinstead Town were shocking Hastings United by going 2-0 up after 38 minutes; Robin Deen and Jack Conway with the goals.
It was like poking a wasps nest with a stick.
United had one back before half time, Daniel Ajakaiye with it. They then added EIGHT more after the break. Ajakaiye finished the evening on four, to make it fourteen for the season so far, whist Jamie Fielding, Antonio Walker Barth (2) and Sam Crutwell (also 2) added the rest. One player who didn’t find the net for U’s was Adam Lovatt, but according to one transfer gossip website the midfielder is currently being watched by Crystal Palace, Brighton and Watford. If they were watching last night United may have a queue of suitors for half of their side!
Hythe Town travelled to Herne Bay and hit six, and unusually for this season Zak Ansah wasn’t the top scorer- that honour went to his replacement after 58 minutes, Junior Aikhionbare, who got a brace. Nigel Neita, Salvyn Kisitu and Jack Sammouitis got the other goals, three of which came in the last ten minutes.
Folkestone Invicta were the next highest scorers, hitting four without reply at Ashford United, Joshua Vincent, Alfie Paxman, Jack Evans and Johan Ter Horst finding the net. The stripes will be worried by an injury to Adam Yusuff in the first half- reports from the match suggested a dislocated shoulder. Get well soon Adam.
Elsewhere, Barking v Brentwood Town and Coggeshall Town v Great Wakering Rovers each went to penalties. At Mayesbrook Park Tony Stokes and Kojo Apenteng had given Town a two goal advantage, only for an Abs Seymour double to draw the match level, but Town went on to win 5-4 in the shootout; whilst at Coggeshall a late Jason Ring equaliser for Great Wakering took the match to a shootout after Kieran Bishop and Darren Mills had put Town in the driving seat- Jake Gordon responding for Rovers. The home side managed to triumph in the shootout, 3-2.
Felixstowe and Walton United v AFC Sudbury saw both sides find the net only via a penalty shootout, the home side triumphing 4-3.
Tooting and Mitcham United defeated a youthful Margate side 2-0 at Imperial Fields, Razzaq Coleman and Elijah Simpson with the first half goals, whilst a first half double from James Ewington gave Northwood a victory over Bury Town by the same scoreline. A late Reece Hewitt goal gave Tilbury a slender victory over Marlow, whilst Greenwich Borough went to Molesey and also won 1-0, Lawrence Adjei finding the net.
Brad Warner gave AFC Hornchurch victory at Basildon United, finding the net after 25 minutes, whilst managerless Bishop’s Stortford won 2-1 at Hertford Town. Jake Cass and Ruel Sotiriou scored for the away side, whilst Tommy Wade pulled one back for Town- but it wasn’t enough.
Worthing moved up to second place in the only Premier Division match last night, but they only got one point at Potters Bar Town and had to come from behind to do it, Joel Colbran equalising after Bradley Sach had put the Scholars ahead.
Victory for either Bowers & Pitsea or Aveley in last night’s match at the Len Salmon would have put them top of the division, but they ended the night in second and third place respectively after a thrilling 3-3 draw which saw Aveley twice take the lead and then equalise in the very last minute. Alex Akrofi opened the scoring for the Millers 9 minutes in, before David Knight equalised seven minutes later. Aveley then went back in front just after the break through Andrew Freeman, only for Lewis Manor to equalise after another seven minutes. Callum Leahy then gave the home side the lead, only for Akrofi to silence the home fans right at the death.
South East Division
Three Bridges were able to get their first points and their first victory of the season last night, goals from Connor French and Trevor McCreadie giving them the points and consigning opponents Sevenoaks Town to the bottom of the table, Bridges leaping two spots to 18th. Elsewhere, Whitstable Town and Haywards Town were both failing to find the net at the Belmont Ground.